A joke for every Occasion
by Sarahloulabellx
Summary: An alternate view on series 26 episode 9, when the ambulance is rammed off the road two hearts will be broken forever one physically and one emotionally. Emotional one-shot.


_Hey guys this is a quick oneshot it is an alternate version of series 26 episode 9 where the ambulance is rammed off the road. I still cant believe they all got out of that with hardly a scratch. _

_This definatley does not have a happy ending so just be prepared. _

_I hope you Enjoy I was really unsure about whether to upload this but I have bite the bullet and here goes..._

_Disclaimer I own nothing all rights belong to the BBC and others. _

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Jokes; It was well known that for them jokes and sarcastic comments were like a comfort blanket. They used them when they were happy, sad, scarred and even angry and that's why right as they faced one of the most exhilarating and fearful moments in their carers they were still cracking jokes.

'Keep it steady Jeffrey' She called as she tried to get the required aid to their patient.

'Yeah steady anything else?' He replied looking to see where the mad man had gone again.

Dixie pulled her inhaler out of the medical cupboard all this excitement was making her chest tighten. She grabbed hold off the nearest solid object as the ambulance was rammed again.

'What is this nutter's problem' Shouted Jeff trying to keep the ambulance as steady as possible. He called for back up then realised with a gulp the next big problem the barrier of trees ended and soon the road was left to drop down a steep grassy incline.

'Princess you may wanna hold on to something!' He shouted as the black car moved from ramming the end of the ambulance and ended up driving along side the van.

Suddenly, as the incline came up they felt the van rock and they were all thrown violently around the ambulance.

Jeff shielded his face as he felt the windows smash and large chunks of glass flew around everywhere, he gasped as his seatbelt tightened around his torso leaving inevitable bruises and slight cuts, he groaned as his head began to pound after being shaken around so violently. He soon realised the ambulance had stopped rolling and they where on their side coughing he slowly un-did his seatbelt. Manoeuvring so he didn't fall he stood on the door and waiting until the dizziness past, crouched so he could see into the back of the van.

As the ambulance tipped over and began to roll Sam fell out of her seat getting her arm caught on the edge of the cabinet she grunted as she felt the blood drip down her wrist. She continued to be bashed around the ambulance but finally caught the trolley and managed to stop herself from being chucked anywhere else. By the time the ambulance had stilled Sam found herself lying across part of their patient with her eyes closed in an attempt to stop her head spinning.

Both Jeff and Sam looked around the cab at the same time and both noticed the unmoving figure lying near the front cab covered in debris 'Dixie' Shouted Jeff as he moved to step over her crouching down by her head and moving away some of the fallen medical materials.

Sam did the same pulling away the other items covering her until she got to the medical bag covering Dixie's chest, as she went to pull it away she could feel warm, sticky liquid on the bag. Once she had removed the bag she looked down and gasped in horror this made Jeff look up at her.

'What, What is it?' He asked urgently

'Her...Her chest look' stammered Sam she was used to seeing injuries but this was different this wasn't war.

Jeff looked down and visibly paled, just underneath Dixie's heart there was a big shard of glass sticking out of her chest with blood bubbling out around it.

'No Dixie, No you ain't doing this to me, not now!' Shouted Jeff as he began to move the wreckage and gather all the bandages and other items he needed.

Sam moved to kick open the ambulance doors as she heard sirens getting closer and knew that if they handed over the man Jeff and herself could work on Dixie.

Jeff stopped his frantic gathering as he noticed Dixie was beginning to come round, he grabbed what he had found and ran back to her kneeling by her head he brushed the hair out of her eyes. 'Hey sweetheart, its me your devoted husband'

'Jeffrey since when have you been devoted' she whispered smiling at the fool of a man she had married in attempts to please her father.

'Nice to see your sense of humour's still in tact' He joked as he moved to cut her uniform away so he could get better access to the wound.

Before he could Dixie brought her hand up placing it on his chest she shook her head.

'What is it princess?' He asked thinking she was in pain, he had tried to find some morphine but all the small vials had smashed.

'Stop, Jeffrey there is no way I am surviving this one' She admitted, she could already taste the blood in her mouth and couldn't feel anything around her wound, she knew the glass had hit some major arteries and more than likely it being there was just prolonging the inevitable. She was facing the idea that even if she did make it back to the ED she would bleed out as soon as they removed the object.

'Hell no, Dix your a fighter don't you be giving up on me now' stammered Jeff the fear of losing his best friend causing actual physical pain.

'You ain't gonna let me go are you' she realised looking up into his eye's tears and determination clear for all to see.

'Never' he whispered back using the back of his hand to wipe away the tears which had already fallen.

'I ain't gonna make it back to the ED surely you can see that look at it, don't let our relationship cloud your judgement' She tried to make him see sense, see that he was just going to end up hurting more.

Jeff just shook his head, 'No Dixie I am going to do everything in my power to save you and you will be laughing this up in a couple of months when I get a paper cut or something and you complain that you survived this' He rambled on as he moved again this time Dixie didn't stop him from trying to help her she didn't have the strength.

Sam watched the scene unfold in front of her, she knew Dixie was right, she more than likely wasn't going to make it back to the ED. You could see her breathing was already shallow and laboured but she could also see Jeff wasn't going to back down without a fight.

Dixie felt incredibly tired, she could hardly breath and her entire body was slowly becoming numb 'Jeffrey' she gasped out trying to get the man's attention she needed to talk to him. He wasn't listening he was franticly trying to stop the blood that was coming out of the wound.

'Jeff, stop your wife needs you. Let me' said Sam as she crouched down to sit beside the man placing her hand's over his she nodded in reassurance and waited until the man moved away to sit beside Dixie's head.

'Dixie, I'm so sorry, this is all my...'

'Jeffrey Collier, don't you dare blame yourself!' She interrupted moving the man's chin so he was looking straight into her eyes 'Promise me Jeff'

Swallowing the lump which had formed in his throat he grabbed her hand 'Please princess, please just hold on' he begged her.

'Do you remember the first time we met?' She asked gasping as a sharp pain shot through her chest. 'Well I thought you were an arrogant sod' she admitted laughing slightly at the memory.

'Yeah princess you said more than once in fact' he smiled wiping the blood away that had begun to trickle out of the corner of her mouth.

'Well not much has changed accept now your not just an arrogant sod your my arrogant sod' She admitted smiling at his small laugh, 'You need to stay strong, for me please'

Jeff closed his eyes and looked away just for a second but Dixie could tell she was tearing his heart in two. He looked back at his wife 'You've always been the strong one Dix, I don't know where to start. You kept my feet on the ground all those times I was lost, scarred...helpless you where their standing by my side picking me up being my rock. Dixie I can't do it alone your my best friend, my wife for crying out loud' He admitted voice shaking with un-shed tears.

'Sweetheart, I...I I'm scared' She admitted she couldn't be strong any more her entire body was growing cold.

'ssshhhh I'm here' Jeff said stroking her hair again 'I love you sweetheart I ain't gonna let you go' He promised.

Dixie smiled up at Jeff 'I know you wont, darlin' slowly her eyes began to droop shut.

'No princess stay awake, don't you dare close those eyes' he ordered looking down at Sam who was still putting pressure around the wound.

'Let me go Jeff'

'Never'

'I'm sorry' she sighed letting her eyes slide shut. 'I always was a stubborn cow' She smiled back slowly letting her body relax.

'You where my stubborn cow, I love you princess' He admitted letting the tears fall as he could feel the strength fading from Dixie's body.

'I love you too, I told you we would be lucky if we got 40 years' she joked as blood began to bubble out of her mouth at an alarming rate.

She sighed again opening her eyes starring those deep blue pools of emotion straight into Jeff's 'Goodnight Jeffrey, I'll see you soon'

'Goodnight princess' he sighed as her body went still and her head lolled into his chest.

'Jeff she's passed away' said Sam placing two shaking fingers on Dixies pulse point.

'No, she's just sleeping Sam, she's just sleeping.' He explained as his tears fell lifelessly to the ground.


End file.
